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@salty_chief@lemmy.world to Funny@sh.itjust.works • 4 months ago

Mellencamp

lemmy.world

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Mellencamp

lemmy.world

@salty_chief@lemmy.world to Funny@sh.itjust.works • 4 months ago
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  • @Fuckfuckmyfuckingass@lemmy.world
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    1•4 months ago

    This has happened to me before.

    • EbbyA
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      1•4 months ago

      Nothing to debate here with a username like that. Just smile and nod as I skip to the next post…

      • massive_bereavement
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        0•4 months ago

        <rolls up the window and clicks on the door locks while smiling so hard a tear comes out>

  • sandwich.make(bathing_in_bismuth)
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    0•4 months ago

    Everyone here with pre signs of colon/prostate cancer. Not saying it can’t happen but man, every male gets to deal with prostate cancer at some point in their life (most grow old without it ever being noticeable, but its still thete.)

  • @But_my_mom_says_im_cool@lemmy.world
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    0•4 months ago

    I thought it would be called a Mellencamp cause of his shit music.

    I swear I am gonna jam a microphone down that man’s throat if I have to hear “small town” one more damn time. You can’t just rhyme small town with small town, stop saying small town!!

    • @Stamau123@lemmy.world
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      0•4 months ago

      Yeah that had to be the worst, most repetitive song I’ve heard on the radio, and that’s saying something

  • @Zdvarko@lemmy.world
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    0•4 months ago

    So aah for science what diet would um assist in this happening?

    • @RedAggroBest@lemmy.world
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      0•4 months ago

      Ignore any other advice and do heroin. The post-constipation dump is the only way I thought this happened to people lol

    • Nightwatch Admin
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      0•4 months ago

      As a plant eater I hate to say this but a pure meat diet (absolutely nothing else) will do this to you, it’ll be a once-a-week (or so) ass ripping constipation dump with the best chances for your eh… fulfilment.

      • @jet@hackertalks.com
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        0•4 months ago

        As a pure meat eater, i have some bad news, carnivore poops are regular, small, and without any constipation.

      • @PoliteDudeInTheMood@lemmy.ca
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        0•4 months ago

        I had a UTI recently (thanks to the diabeetus) and for some reason I got constipated as a side effect. Can confirm, 3 days backup was enough to trigger this interesting event.

  • @thatradomguy@lemmy.world
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    0•4 months ago

    This reminds me about this really weird forum post I read about a long time where a lady started talking about how she orgasmed during child birth. I call BS.

    • @salty_chief@lemmy.worldOP
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      0•4 months ago

      Why would you call Bruce Springsteen?

      • @cRazi_man@europe.pub
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        0•4 months ago

        Who knows more about the ladies physiology than George of the Jungle.

  • @kayzeekayzee@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    0•4 months ago

    I… is this a real thing??

    • @scoobford@lemmy.zip
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      0•4 months ago

      Yes. It hasn’t happened to me, but I had a close call once.

      One of many things I will not be discussing with my therapist.

      • @Quadhammer@lemmy.world
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        0•4 months ago

        “Let’s go back to the time you had that life altering turd splooge. How do you think this affected your relationship with your father?”

    • @CmdrShepard49@sh.itjust.works
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      0•4 months ago

      Im curious too but i know there’s a 0% chance of getting a straight answer here in the comments.

    • @tacosanonymous@mander.xyz
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      0•4 months ago

      Yes.

    • @Atomic@sh.itjust.works
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      0•4 months ago

      I have no idea. And I’d rather not find out either. Nothing good will come from trying to find out.

      • @Jerkface@lemmy.world
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        0•4 months ago

        A little good might come ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

    • @RustyShackleford@literature.cafe
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      0•4 months ago

      Technically it’s possible, but the likelihood of it ever happening to someone is about as good as you finding a leprechaun’s pot of gold.

      • @panda_abyss@lemmy.ca
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        0•4 months ago

        Hah, jokes on you, that has happened to me

        I found a pot of gold

        • @RustyShackleford@literature.cafe
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          0•4 months ago

  • @Spacehooks@reddthat.com
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    0•4 months ago

    Sooo its not normal? Have I been lied too?

  • classic
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    0•4 months ago

    Lots of TIL in this one

  • Random_Character_A
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    0•4 months ago

    Sitting here doom scrolling jemmy and waiting for my first mellencamp.

  • @TriflingToad@sh.itjust.works
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    0•4 months ago

    that one guy on Quora’s quest to shit cum and piss at the same time is actually possible. Who knew

    • @Quadhammer@lemmy.world
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      0•4 months ago

      The unholy trinity…

  • @Olhonestjim@lemmy.world
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    0•4 months ago

    If you ever have to take a dump outside, away from a toilet, this can happen more easily. At least it’s easier to notice. Happens to me nearly every time I have to do so. I work way out in the field, so often enough. Probably happens at the toilet more often than you think. You just have it tucked so piss stays in the bowl.

    • @IndolentRoshi@lemmy.world
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      0•4 months ago

      But ejaculate’s not piss?

      • @Olhonestjim@lemmy.world
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        0•4 months ago

        Yeah, but you probably don’t notice the ejaculate because you piss too.

        • @CmdrShepard49@sh.itjust.works
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          4 months ago

          You think guys don’t notice getting a sudden erection or feeling an orgasm? There’s more to it than just having cum come out of your dick.

  • @Allero@lemmy.today
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    0•4 months ago

    Keep it in mind: every time you take a shit, you’re essentially reverse dildoing your ass. Very homo.

    • @ryannathans@aussie.zone
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      0•4 months ago

      Wiping your ass is especially gay

      • @Spacehooks@reddthat.com
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        0•4 months ago

        I read a story where a guy didnt wipe ass cause it makes you gay. He let it dry out and “handle itself”. I was really hoping he was pro-bidet…

        • @ryannathans@aussie.zone
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          0•4 months ago

          That makes my ass itch just reading it

    • @MTK@lemmy.world
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      0•4 months ago

      Umm, reverse homo, so super straight actually.

      • @Allero@lemmy.today
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        0•
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        4 months ago

        Sucking dick is then always hetero, because it goes in on the other side, so kinda reversed too?

        • @OldChicoAle@lemmy.world
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          0•4 months ago

          Sucking dick is always okay

  • @RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world
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    0•4 months ago

    What? No matter how bad a diet I’ve had this has never been a thing.

    • @Apocalypteroid@lemmy.org
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      0•4 months ago

      Try harder

  • @LogicalDrivel@sopuli.xyz
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    0•4 months ago

    I can almost feel the definition of mellencamp replacing a childhood memory in my brain.

  • @then_three_more@lemmy.world
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    0•4 months ago

    Careful, you might summon the Wanky Shit Demon by mistake

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